Hello again dahlings, as you can see I’ve been bullied into doing yet another of these stupid editorials. Not without a good stiff drink or two, or three, or four. My, Issue number 5, how time flies when your having such fu… full on full frontal lobotomy dance moves inside yer head. Let’s crack on and get it over and done with, pubs don’t stay open forever you know.

Firstly we have to welcome two new members. We now have an office cat, Mankie the Cat. Smelly thing. I thought it was just here to be a furry duster but apparently Charlotte is going to teach it to read and write. Good luck with that girl! I don’t think the Mankie diaries will be appearing anytime soon, but still a furry duster and nose wipe is always handy. More immediately, we’ve enlisted the services of Ben Nitt, and you can find out all about Ben and what he’s going to be doing on page 9. So it’s pointless me blabbing on about it here.

Next we have an important announcement to make. Prepared to be excited - apparently. We plan to make either Issue 7 or 8 (to be decided) an open submissions edition for friends and followers. We want to know what you’re about and what you do. I’m excited - not! More fucking work for me. We should have all the final details next issue.

Lastly, Charlotte has had a very good (so she says) poem, ‘Wedlocked’, published by New Fairy Tales (Issue 3). Her poem has also been promoted by the very sweet editor, Charles Christian, at Ink Sweat and Tears. Now we was going to reprint here, but if you go to the archive section of New Fairy Tales you can download a free copy of the poem along with some cool art work, and also in their audio section there is a very excellent MP3, brilliantly performed by student actors. We decided not to reprint here because although these downloads are free, the magazine asks for a small donation which goes to Derian House Children’s Hospice. Honestly sweeties it’s worthwhile and your pennies would be doing good things.

So, my little gusset munchers, what have we in store for you this time? Ben puts the members through their paces with a little competition, Terry becomes a Pre-Raphaelite activist, the cartoon wankers get stung, and if that don’t send you to sleep there’s always some so called poetry from Drew, Charlotte and the other bloke.

That’s me done. I’m off to the bar. We've got a book release to celebrate, and Charlotte's buying! A bottle of gin and a picture of a bottle of tonic, please bartender.

See yer in six months time, sweeties.

x Cath



The DNA of Carbon -1- P.A.Levy
i5 a.m -2- iDrew
Dick & Tom Investigate: Honey -3- Dick and Tom
Some Nights I Give Myself The Rag Doll Blues -4- Charlotte DeAth
sparE pART -5-

Terry Wrist vs J.W. Waterhouse

Weekend Raver -6- P.A.Levy
iU -7- iDrew
Hang-Ups -8- P.A.Levy
Introduction of Ben Nitt inc. Poetry Surgery -9- Ben Nitt
One Word Poem Competition -10- Ben Nitt